Washington, D.C. - President Barack Obama celebrated his one hundred days in office today by throwing a Kool-Aid party in the White House Rose garden for the remaining non-defecting members of the Republican Party.
Meanwhile, recent democratic convert, Senator Arlen Specter, served up refreshments from an ice cube and Kool-Aid filled pitcher to his former conservative contemporaries, while wearing a red and yellow-checkered apron with the Obama "Yes We Can" campaign slogan printed on it.
"The apron. That was my idea," Chief of Staff, Rahm Emanuel. "I wanted him to wear a black leather teddy, fishnet stockings and face mask with a zipper on it, but family were at the celebration. Maybe later, after the kids go to bed."
Although Specter made the rounds pouring the Obama Kool-Aid, his Republicans friends refused to take a drink. A visibly frustrated Specter then poured a tall glass for himself, drinking it in front of them.
"I guess he was trying to reassure them it was okay to take a drink of the Obama Kool-Aid," said a pool reporter who attended the event. "But it came off like he was taunting them. Especially when he keeled over, fell to the floor twitching for a few minutes, before jumping back up onto his feet and throwing his arms open saying, 'Tah-dah!"
"No rush," said Emanuel. "They'll come around sooner or later. After all, they now need us more than we need them."