Written by Chuck Terzella
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Topics: George W. Bush, Iraq

Wednesday, 30 June 2004

The turnover of Sovereignty in Iraq has occurred two days early in the greatest of secrecy and under heavy security. President George W. Bush received the word of the transfer in a note from Condoleezza Rice while at a NATO Summit in Turkey. Mr. Bush was with British Prime Minister Tony Blair at the time. Both men were seen to smile when they heard the news. Mr. Bush scribbled a reply on Ms. Rice's note saying, "Let freedom reign!" The White House released a photocopy of the note to prove that Mr. Bush could actually spell reign on the first try.

President Bush was in Turkey with Mr. Blair in an effort to convince NATO to send troops into Iraq to help with the security situation in Iraq, but NATO members politely declined the offer, collectively saying, " Yeah, right."

In celebration of the transfer Iraqi insurgents killed three American troops in a roadside bombing and an equally ecstatic Pentagon has increased the tours of duty of 5,300 American Reservist soldiers.

Some Insurgents were less than pleased at hearing the news of the early transfer. Abdul bull Durham, President of the Union of Thugs, Losers, Dead Enders and Assassins, said in a written statement, " Our Union had been planning a great many...celebrations...to honor the transfer and now all those...fireworks...will be wasted, unless of course we find places to...party...with them."

Unnamed White House Source Wegman (Pudgy) Waterhouse, speaking on the condition of anonymity said, " Everybody says that we did it to mess with the Thugs Union, but that's not entirely true. We cut out early to save on the rent. That place was costing us like, 5 million bucks a day. We're funneling that ten million to the Bush 04 campaign. We've been a little off in the fund raising department these days."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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