Written by J.K. Baltzersen
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Saturday, 25 April 2009

image for Cats to the White House
Real changes are coming to the White House with kittens and toilet paper.

Washington, D.C. Real change is coming to the White House, an executive spokesman says. The newly acquired dog will be ditched for four kittens. These will be named Paris, Hilton, Britney, and Spears.

President Obama was made aware that the previous President had had a dog by a PR advisor. The advisor advised the President to go for something else. The President would have liked to keep the dog, but realized that a perception of real change in such a significant area as house pets must come before everything.

The White House spokesman said the arrival of cats comes in addition to installing the U.S. Constitution as toilet paper all over the President's mansion.

When confronted with the fact that President George W. Bush had called the Constitution "just a piece of paper," the President denied that his toilet paper move was just more of the same. "The Bush statement was totally dishonest. We all know that we politicos have a much lower opinion of the Constitution than considering it to be 'just a piece of paper.' We really view it as suitable as toilet paper. My act is an act of honesty. None of my predecessors dared be this honest, although we all do believe the same. I am going boldly where no one has gone before."

No U.S. Senator or Congressman was available for comments to these real changes, including Congressman Ron Paul.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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