Written by Frank Cotolo
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Tuesday, 29 June 2004

image for Nader topples top two, poll says
Nader best in Presidential race.

CORCUPONIA, Wisc. -- A new poll released shows that if the general election were held today, the general public would be confused and start to shop for Christmas.

However, that same study shows that Ralph Nader will win in a landslide.

"The people polled went for Nader like a racoon to a bail of dirty hay," said pollster Edward Smiley.

With a margin of error of one to two, if not four to five and maybe ten to twenty points, the results didn't make either candidate think differently about the campaign.

"I plan to do exactly what I have been doing, only more of it," said Bush.

"I plan to keep pushing and getting my message across, no matter what message that is," said Kerry.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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