NEW YORK CITY - The Money, Money, Money Man, aka Donald Trump has offered to pay for Susan Boyle to have a complete makeover.
The Donald said that he will fly "The Scottish Songstress" to Manhattan and he will have his personal hairdresser Mr. FuFu give her a total makeover.
He added that when Mr. FuFu gets through with the 47-year-old songbird, her hairdo will almost look as beautiful as his hairdo does.
Trump said that he has also instructed his hairdresser to pluck about 400 hairs from each of Miss Susan's eyebrows.
The building mogul has also arranged for Boyle to stay at his world famous Trump Tower. There, Susan will be receive a one-hour massage by the best masseuse on the Right Coast, Mitzi "Magic Fingers" McPiper.
Trump confessed that Mitzi is so good that 90 percent of her customers actually ask her to marry them before she's through.
Donald spoke with his good-looking daughter Ivanka and she has agreed to take Susan on a shopping spree to Macy's Bloomingdale's, and Neiman Marcus.
When Trump was asked why he was doing this wonderful gesture of kindness for Susan Boyle he replied that he loves helping the underdog.
He then added, "And if you'll remember, I did the same exact thing for Anita Bryant, Kathie Lee Gifford, and Tatiana Del Toro.
In other news. Cornbread Records recording artist Loretta Lynn has just released her 12th single with the word "Cheatin'" in the title.
Her newest release, which was penned by Bruce Springsteen, is titled, "Cheatin's Just A Seven Letter Word For Cheating."