Written by Monkey Woods
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Topics: Sex, Breasts

Tuesday, 21 April 2009

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Women who breastfeed their babies may be lowering their own risk of a heart attack, heart disease or stroke, research suggests.

A US study found women who breastfed for more than a year were 10% less likely to develop the conditions than those who never breastfed.

The news is especially good for men who like sucking tits, and, of course, for women who enjoy having their tits sucked!

Millions of men feel like there is nothing better than waking up in a morning and having an enormous great 'dummy' shoved in their mouths as an appetizer just before breakfast, with many more 'chewing' just before they retire to bed for the night.

This afternoon, the women who we interviewed in New York's Central Park were overjoyed at the study's findings. One ample-chested bitch, Carla Punani, 22, told us:

"It's great news! I always worry about heart disease and strokes. That's why I regularly get as many guys as I can to suck my tiddies!"

Another buxom wench, Trudi Grapple, 15, was also pleased. She broke off from having her nipples soothed by the pursed lips of one of the Park's ice cream vendors, Geno Visconti, and said:

"Oh, that's great, Geno! Come on, baby. Stop me having a stroke, honey!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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