Written by indethinker
Print this
Topics: Florida, Bestiality

Monday, 30 March 2009

image for Florida Counties to Fight New Bestiality Laws
Megs Brother Billy

Cross City, Dixie County - In an amazing development four Florida counties, Lafayette, Gilchrist, Levy and Dixie have issued a legal challenge to Florida's new bestiality laws.

Citing an oft overlooked 1839 statute Major Jeremiah Blunkin of Cross City has ordered the city attorney to fight the new law and said: "This law is just a badly written piece of lily livered liberal interference, in our God given rite to love our livestock"

The statute he quoted prohibits "unnatural and lascivious acts between consenting adults" but as Mayor Blunkin argues says nothing about animals.

The mayor who also owns a local animal/human dating agency is livid: "Hell this will thin the counties dating pool no end, and ruin my side business."

This new law was enacted after the shameful case of a 48 year old Mossy Head man who abducted "Meg" a neighbors goat, and strangled it with its collar during intercourse.

Outraged citizens called for the arrest and prosecution of the man, Jimmy Dubbard, but the local sheriffs department refused to act on account of it not been illegal.
Mayor Blunkin has ordered the city attorney to file thousands of suits against married couples who filled in a county sex survey.

"God knows what the hell "doggy style" and "kharmi sultry" is" exclaimed the mayor.

"But it sure as hell sounds unnatural and lascivious to me, whatever the hell that means"

Florida Attorney General Bill McCollum in a press release said the State would fight the mayor on both the sex suits and the animal issues.

"Mayor Blunkin is living in the dark ages, and needs to represent all his electorates needs, not the twisted animal instincts of a few perverts" said McCollum.

Make indethinker's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 3 multiplied by 1?

9 3 8 12
47 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more