Written by rfreed
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Topics: bailout, AIG

Monday, 23 March 2009

image for AIG Must Change Its Name To Get Bailout Money
US Currency Put On Endangered Species List.

One of the mandates of the new bailout to insurance company AIG is that they must change their name to something more appropriate.

Their original title - American Insurance Group - suggests that they are patriotic and believe in the principals the US was founded upon, for example self-sufficiency, integrity, honesty, non-corruptedness, fair play, and patriotism. As has been proven in the last few months, patriotism to AIG means taking big handouts from the government and sticking part of it in its own pockets.

The United States, joined by all Central and South American nations, has sued to disallow AIG from any further use of the title 'American' in their name. Henceforth AIG will stand for Astonishingly Incredible Greed, a much more appropriate name for the company. Furthermore, all employees who received bonuses that utilized bailout money will have this title tattooed permanently upon their foreheads for all to know.

Natural selection will then help winnow these out to a minimum to prevent further occurrences as many will be murdered in cold blood on the street when they are seen. And, since AIG is now 80% owned by the US taxpayers, its upper echelon will be given a time schedule for cleaning the toilets at all the local schools on Sundays to help maintain the society they live in and to truly earn their bailout.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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