American President Barack Obama was today removed from the White House and relegated to the Special Presidents team. After seeming able and capable in two years' campaigning to get elected, it now turns out that the African can't even appear on a dreadful US chat show without showing his ignorance and prejudice.
Speaking from his new home in Hawaii, the former President said: 'I apologize unreservedly for insulting the Presidential team, and showing the world what a cretin I really am.'
'I was only elected because Americans thought I was intelligent and made George W Bush look like a retarded chimpanzee, but at least he never insulted millions of people the first time he ever appeared in public. Jeez, George seemed actually a nice if dumb sorta guy, I now seem like a pathetic, feeble inadequate boy.'
Some have said being inadequate is the best qualification for being President of the United States of America, others were less kind. Chat show host Hair Nono said: 'Here we all were, thinking Obama was Mr Niceguy, the kind of guy you'd buy a second-hand car from, but it turns out already that he's just a horrible, grinning creep that has a Nazi mentality, and is as prejudiced as Jesse Jameson or Adolf Hitzl.'
'Maybe the former Senator should join the SS or something, they had the same sort of views about Special Presidents, and it usually involved vans and carbon monoxide.'
The new President will be a clown. Again.