Written by Monkey Woods
Print this

Thursday, 19 March 2009

image for Another Austrian Nazi Story
People queueing up to get into the US today

The US has deported to Austria a former SS man it says was involved in the Nazi killing of more than 8,000 Jews, shot in a single day and buried in pits. Nasty bastard.

Josias Kumpf, 83, moved to the US from Austria in 1956, settling in Wisconsin and becoming a US citizen in 1964. Very slack, that.

The US justice department sued to strip him of his citizenship in 2003. A bit like locking the stable door after the horse has bolted, if you ask me.

He was found to have served as a guard at Sachsenhausen concentration camp in Germany and Trawniki in Poland, where the mass shooting took place in 1943.

Kumpf, not to be confused with the book of the same name, Mein Kumpf, written by cellar-dweller Josef Fritzl, was born in Serbia, joined the SS Totenkopf forces at Sachsenhausen in 1942, and served there for about a year before transferring to Trawniki.

An eerie similarity between Kumpf and Fritzl emerged yesterday, when it was discovered that Kumpf, like his countryman, also had a cellar.

Weird fuckers.

Make Monkey Woods's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 1 plus 1?

9 3 7 2
65 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience on our website, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more