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Wednesday, 18 March 2009

image for Cosmetics Giant Using Bunnies For Cosmetic Testing Again?
"I've heard the rumors, too."

Several leading cosmetics companies have quietly stopped testing products on animals. The moves are in response to years of pressure by animal-rights groups and reflect growing confidence in the reliability of alternative testing methods.

Avon, Revlon and the cosmetics and toiletries businesses of Faberge have long abandoned animal testing, and two other companies, Mary Kay Cosmetics and Amway, have declared a moratorium on the practice.

However, a very reliable source, a fired worker, has told the press that they are definitely using bunnies again and is he ever mad.

Darrell Westchester, who had been working for a cosmetic giant for ten years, says he was fired because of "not watching my hands".

"Now what kind of reason is that? Not washing my hands, I could understand, but watching? They wrote it down here, take a look."

He was certainly correct stated the reporter, but before Mr. Westchester could say anything else, we were both told to move along by a policeman who stated that Mr Heffner was coming in at that moment with yet another load of bunnies.

"He's already sold his old family home, now he's renting out the bunnies by the hour", stated the officer. "I think Madoff got him too."

When this happened and the reporter suddenly turned to Mr. Westchester, he was running down the hillside towards a car, probably his own.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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