Written by Vondrook
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Topics: Archeology, Furby

Tuesday, 17 March 2009

The archeological world was turned upside down when the fossil remains of a mythical animal known as a "Furby" was discovered in New Mexico.

The remains were accidently discovered by State College students on an archeological retreat searching for Dilaposaurus bones. Hank Richland, a 22 year old Senior at the college was amazed. "I couldn't believe it," he told reporters. "I thought I was dusting off some sort of boring, ancient ichthy remains, but what was preserved in that rock I had only seen in Mythology textbooks!"

For those who don't know, the Furby has been classified as a mythological creature dating back to the late 20th century, and was considered the God of Destruction by the Cheyenne Indian Tribe. The Furby, according to Cheyenne legend, would smother the land with devastating floods or terrible lightning storms if not properly appeased.

Dr. Fartha, the head of the archeological retreat, has already done work on the remains to gather more information. "Carbon-14 dating has placed this animal in the proper time frame of the myth, and points out that the Furby dates all the way back to 1998, and according the legend, became extinct in 1999."

Further information collected by Dr. Fartha includes anatomical observations such as the ability to blink it's large, bulbous eyes, and speak through its small beak, something only a parrot can do. But Fartha points out that, "The Furby had a much more diverse vocabulary judging by the size of it's smaller beak, allowing it to contract tightly like human lips and speak more words than your typical 21st century parrot."

So what does this mean for the archeological community? "I think we are going to have to start from scratch," Dr. Fartha stated. "Everything we thought we knew about mythology vs. scientific truth is out the window. The line has been blurred."

Funding for the State College and nearly all other schools with some form of Archeology program will most likely increase greatly, due to a demand to find more creatures that were once deemed "fictional."

"We already have plans to begin digging on the eastern side of the country," Dr. Fartha said in conclusion. "There are a number of high income donators to the school asking us to search for the ever-elusive creature, The Teddy Ruxpin, and due to recent accounts of citizens in the surrounding boroughs, we think the area near the Appalachian Mountains holds the answer."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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