Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Tuesday, 17 March 2009

image for Tom Brady and Gisele Bundchen Honeymooning In Brazil
Tom Brady pulling his new bride Gisele Bundchen's purse after arriving in Brazil

HORIZONTINA, Brazil - Newlyweds Tom Brady, 31, and Gisele Bundchen, 28, are honeymooning in her hometown of Horizontina, Brazil, a town which derives its name from the Horizon and Tina Turner.

Three time super bowl champ Brady told a reporter for ESPN Amazon that his favorite Brazilian foods are Pato Vato (Guy Duck), Brazilian Mac and Cheese, Brazilian Pepperoni Pizza, and Brazil Nuts.

He says that several years ago he ate two pounds of Brazil Nuts while watching an episode of "American Idol" which featured performances by Carrie Underwood, Bo Bice, Vonzell Solomon, and Anthony Fedorov.

Bundchen, who stands 5 foot 10, is the highest paid supermodel in the world. She made $35 million in 2008. She was also named Newsweek's "Lascivious Woman of The Year."

Other awards that she has recently received include "The Woman With The Sexiest Thighs," "The Woman With The Sexiest Bottom," and "The Woman That The Super Bowl Champion Pittsburgh Steelers Would Most Like To Have Rub Away Their Leg Cramps."

CBS anchor Katie Couric said that she once saw Ann Coulter standing next to Gisele Bundchen at a book signing in Manhattan, and she said that poor Ann Coulter looked like a flea market tongue depressor.

(EDITOR'S NOTE: When the newlyweds return to the states they will be residing in their $19.1 million Beverly Hills mansion, the newly renamed "Bun-Bra." The house, which is located at 1618 Yogi Berra Boulevard, was previously owned by Prince Andrew, Andrew Dice Clay, Julie Andrews, and Andrew Jackson.)

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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