Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Thursday, 5 March 2009

image for The Rolling Stones Detained At Heathrow Airport
Eight of the counterfeit Viagara pills that were found taped to a tambourine

LONDON - Mick Jagger, 65, Keith Richards, 65, Ron Wood, 61, Bill Wyman, 72, and Charlie Watts, 67, whose combined ages is 330! were all detained for questioning at London's Heathrow Airport.

It seems that the lads had stashed over 24,000 counterfeit Viagra pills in their guitar cases, snare drums, amplifiers, a tambourine, an inflatible Marianne Faithfull doll, and their underwear.

An airport security guard became suspicious when he saw Charlie Watts walking very gingerly, as if he had a lobster sleeping in his briefs.

Luckily for Mick and the boys, the United Kingdom has not set a quota on the amount of counterfeit Viagara pills that one can bring into the country. The British quintet was released within three minutes and fifteen seconds.

In fact just last week Russell Brand was temporarily detained when Heathrow police found 73,902 counterfeit Viagra pills stuffed in his socks, his shirt, his Fruit-of-The Looms, a few in his ears, and 14 shoved up his (EXPLETIVE DELETED).

The Rolling Stones one of the most popular bands in the world had just returned from Coventry where they had performed at a private dinner party that Kate Winslet had thrown for the Mills sisters, Hayley, Juliet, and Donna.

Mick Jagger told a writer for English Fog Magazine that these days the strongest pill he takes is his daily Wilma Flinstone vitamin pill.

(EDITOR'S NOTE: An official with the London Police Department said that counterfeit Viagara pills look tremendously like the real thing and can sometimes be very hard to detect.)

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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