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Sunday, 1 March 2009

image for Octo Mom Arrested for Breast Feeding Brood while Driving and Talking on Cell Phone!
State Trooper Arrests Octo Mom for Driving While Breast Feeding: Lends a Hand!

San Francisco,CA/ Mother Earth News - The California Highway patrol stopped and arrested a mother of Octuplets for breast feeding her brood while driving 65 mph in the breakdown lane of a busy freeway, and talking to her publicist on a cell phone.

When stopped, the mother was found to be hooked up to a complex milking machine most commonly used on Commercial Dairy Farms in Minnesota and connected to the cigarette lighter receptacle in the mini-van.

The trooper also found 6 other children rollicking in the back of the van, and not secured by safety restraints, or approved car seats.

To add to the drivers woes, she was ticketed for talking on her cell phone, public nudity, and indecent exposure.

An attorney for the woman said she was only trying to multi-task, and the phone call was to her agent who was trying to hook her up to a long term promotional contract with a powdered milk company.

Asked about the high speed driving while breast feeding, the attorney became petulant:

"What is she supposed to do, there's only so many hours in the day, and she only has two boobs, and these kids are hungry all the time!"

The attorney said her client is reviewing a multitude of lucrative financial offers, and she will soon be able to pay back the monumental debt incurred on her behalf by the state of California.

"We're goin' milk this thing for all it's worth," said the Attorney, "and I'm in for 30%! Don't get your tit in a wringer....this is all going to work out fine!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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