Redmond - A foul smelling troll was apprehended today by Redmond police in possession of a large number of stars believed to belong to Nick Fun, a writer for the satirical web site TheSpoof.com
Based on an anonymous tip from a man known only as JO who frequents the underside of bridges, the troll was found in the crook of a hollow moss covered tree jammed full of the missing stars. The troll who goes by the unpronounceable name of Bsmthx claimed personal possession of the stars which he said he came to honestly however a nearby cache of blue socks monogrammed with Nick Fun's name on them raised suspicions and proved to be the troll's undoing.
Taken under interrogation the troll confessed he made occasional attempts to write for TheSpoof.com but his lack of education and natural tendency to be surly always scuttled his efforts to get the stars he treasured by legitimate means.
Not to be dissuaded Bsmthx was skilled in computer wizardry and managed to divert stars awarded to Nick Fun directly to his tree trunk where they piled up.
One he was made aware of the seriousness of the allegations against him the troll struck a plea bargain for a reduced sentence, surprising officials by stepping forward and declaring himself responsible for many scourges of mankind throughout history including floods, drought, tornados, cancer, scurvy, the plague, eczema, scabies, arthritis, computer glitches, Vista, memory loss and sore bum.
Nick Fun has since donated the stars returned to him to charity and is happy he no longer has to wear mismatched socks.