Written by freezer101
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Saturday, 14 February 2009

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Hip Hop Harry in holding cell

In breaking news, Hip Hop Harry was arrested today for allegedly exposing himself, and masturbating in front of a rack of Barbie Dolls at a Meijer's Thrifty Acre Superstore located in Detroit, Michigan. Details were still coming in at this hour, but store security chief, Ned Jenkins, alleged that Harry had taken several of the dolls out of the boxes and lined them up in a semi-circle.

Security personnel, viewing Harry on surveillance cameras, got suspicious when Harry dropped his drawers, and began to masturbate in front of the dolls. When Mr. Jenkins approached Hip Hop Harry, he heard him say, "Yeah, baby dolls, you like that, don't you?"

Unfortunately, for Mr. Jenkins, and Hip Hop Harry, they heard one of the Barbie Dolls reply: "Oh yeah, Harry, you go. Stroke that huge one-eyed cartoon monster, baby." Fortunately, for Mr. Jenkins, and Harry for that matter, a miniature tape recorder was discovered on Harry that was voice activated, and this is what Mr. Jenkins heard as he approached him. Apparently, the tape recording was that of a group of females responding to Harry's "exposures."

Hip Hop Harry is the star of a popular children's TV show featuring hip hop songs used as a learning modality. This is not uncommon, apparently, for these TV show hero's who kids spend their developmental years learning from. Pee Wee Herman, another favorite of children, was caught at a pornographic movie theater some years ago, "adjusting himself."

A confidential source at the Meijer's store also told us that Hip Hop Harry does not live up to the "legend" of having a big Johnson. An eyewitness noted that Hip Hop's ego was much bigger than his pecker, and possibly understands how a small Barbie doll would be highly impressed by the size of Harry's cartoon.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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