Langley,VA/ TOP SECRET ( But Published by New York Times Anyway) - Intelligence committee members are embroiled in another battle concerning the appointment of Leon Panetta to head the CIA. The former Clinton Chief of Staff and California Liberal is now being called "a little too white" by some to hold the office of the Nation's Top Spook.
Opposition seems to be headed by Hillary Clinton, current Secretary of State, who is maneuvering to bring the CIA, USAID, IRS and the Justice Department under her wing as she continues to consolidate power against the California Pelosi Cabal.
Even though Panetta is said to have served former President Clinton well, the former First Lady still harbors a grudge for what she considers Panetta's role in providing her husband with endless young women to satisfy his sexual addiction.
In late breaking news, it has also been reported that Panetta did not issue 1099's (income statements for independent contractors) to the former President's playmates, and encouraged the President to take personal write offs for such things as gifts "to underprivileged children."
Off the record, the Secretary of State said "We don't need a Pimp in the CIA, what we need is a real scum bag that knows how to walk in the shadows, and is capable of mixing with the World's Worst Human Beings, while lying without being caught. "
The Secretary's personal choice had been Kwame Kilpatrick, recent indicted mayor of Detroit, but he failed the latter part of the criteria by being convicted and sentenced for numerous scandals.
Secretary Clinton went on to say her current candidate would be Hollywood Bad Guy Sean Penn, ultra liberal, and confidant of Venezuelan Dictator Hugo Chavez to fill the slot. Clinton indicated the many "bad boy" roles he played in the movies, more than qualifies him for the job, and puts him "miles ahead" of Panetta.
Barbra Striesand and George Clooney agreed with Hillary and took out full page trade ads in the New York Times supporting her choice.