Written by Bureau
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Topics: Police, Theft

Monday, 26 January 2009

image for Brilliant Police Idea Somehow Fails
"What? Another Auto Break-In?"

Following a rash in car break-ins during the holidays, the Shelbyville, Tennessee police department were stumped on what exactly to do as there were only so many officers to handle all the stores in the area.

That was when Officer Fluke Fernburn had a brilliant idea. He suggested that every time an officer checked out an area, he would check out the cars in the store parking lots and when he saw presents visible from outside the vehicle, he would put a ticket on that car saying, "DO NOT LEAVE VISIBLE GIFTS IN YOUR AUTO WHERE CROOKS CAN SEE THEM AND BREAK IN!"

In this way, the car owner would see it, even from a distance and check it out before getting into his car and remember not to leave easy to steal items in the car in the future.

Although officer Fernburn could picture himself receiving a commendation for his idea and maybe passing the plan onto other officers around the country, perhaps even making a short appearance on "Good Morning America" with Diane Sawyer, the plan somehow never worked out.

"I don't understand it", Fernburn told WLAC-TV. "The thefts have gone up nearly 50%! It's almost like someone has tipped the thieves off on which cars to hit."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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