Government officials in Zimbabwe declared victory today over runaway inflation, stating it was finally defeated. To bolster the public's confidence in the nation's currency, Zimbabwe Mint officials issued a 100 trillion dollar coin as evidence demonstrating their confidence in the market. President Matoomba MyAss said he was certain Zimbabwians would get more bang for their buck. Asked what the new coin would buy the average Zimbabwian, MyAss replied, "a little."
The currency, a coin about the size of a Yugo, was conceived by famed coinage designer Wadda My Doing, of China. Attempts to contact the obscure designer were met with hostile insults. At one point, Wadda My Doing was heard yelling, "wadda my doing."
Zimbabwians we contacted on the street were elated with the news, but were left wondering where the merchants would find cash registers large enough to hold the new currency. Many in the street were already gathering, and could be heard for blocks chanting, "Wadda My Doing, Wadda My Doing."
It remains to be seen, however, whether this new currency is actually the end of runaway inflation, or culminates in the death of Wadda My Doing.