Written by Illusnist
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Sunday, 25 January 2009

Since peanut butter is not currently a favored food source for Americans, jelly is stepping up to fill in, in more ways than one. Many people who are accustomed to covering both slices of bread with something are simply doubling up on the jelly, but the movement is much farther reaching.

The United States Food and Drug Administration (FDA) has announced a temporary replacement of peanut butter on traditional "food pyramid" charts with everybody's favorite, grape jelly. This is quite a boost for jelly, which has been regarded as a condiment or some sort of non-food source, until now.

Tomato growers are reportedly banding together to form a similar replacement, calling it the Amercians Ketchup Alliance, aka AKA.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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