Written by Ed E. Druckman
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Friday, 23 January 2009

image for George Bush Inks Book Deal for Coloring Book
Bush does some research

(Crawford-Texas) Former President George W. Bush is wasting no time following in the author footsteps of other former Republican presidents like Richard Nixon. But as with his tenure in office, the book deal is not without controversy. The deal is for a coloring book titled "The White House Years: A colorful story".

The book's press release states it is "to educate children first on the politics of this great nation and in the process illustrate the history of the Bush administration while having fun in the process…just like George Bush did for eight years." However, that simple statement has caused much controversy, since the "book" contains sections on the invasion of Iraq and Guantanamo Bay prison among other events in the Bush presidency.

Democrat strategist James Carville was outraged. "I don't take issue with Bush making his first foray into the memoir world, but I do take issue with it being a coloring book that could co-opt the hearts and minds of future voters. CNN commentator Roland Martin was more direct: "This guy is whacked out of his mind!" Indeed, even Republicans are finding it difficult to rally behind their former leader. Former Republican Presidential candidate John McCain really "wanted to get behind this, but the book has some fundamental flaws, like the lines are too small, so it's hard to stay inside them."

Former White House Press Secretary Dana Perino has been retained as press agent for the project, and she is wasting no time in her answers to the objections. "We have looked at the book and are aware of the line issue. Yes, they are thin. And while that may be an issue for individuals over the age of 8, it is not for the under 8 set. Further, by making the lines thin, our developmental psychologist tells us it will build hand and eye coordination. When asked about the "co-opting" of young hearts and minds, Perino simply said, "However, they decide to color history, it's their choice. Remember there are 64 colors in a box and a sharpener."

While dining at a Crawford Ponderosa Steakhouse earlier this week, the former President also didn't see "what all the fuss was about. This is a coloring book that teaches history. Heck, if I had books like this when I was growing up, I would have learned a lot more about history. Okay, that didn't hurt me any, but these little shavers might not be so lucky."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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