Washington DC: The Federal Communications Commission (FCC) announced today that Spam will now be re-designated as computer reproduced animal poop (CRAP). Spam is the abuse of electronic messaging systems to indiscriminately send unsolicited bulk messages, also known as "Junk Mail."
The FCC change of nomenclature has been driven by the fact that 60-80% of Internet traffic is Spam, namely hoaxes, urban legends, Viagra advertisements, junk product advertisements or Canadian pharmacy products. Internet Service Providers (ISP) are fed up with having to provide bandwidth for this CRAP! SPAM manufactures, such as Hormel, are fed up with their product (chopped pork shoulder meat with ham meat added) being confused with the Internet variety of Spam.
Alas, there is still some confusion by people who say that "SPAM has always tasted like crap." Furthermore, FCC spokespersons advise the public "not to confuse PORN with CRAP."