Washington/DC/ Political Sign of the Times - President Bush, in a rallying call to his fallen GOP party during a departing fireside speech, urged his colleagues to "get with it" and "get it up", in order to combat increased sexual political popularity by penis driven DEMS!
Bush was reacting to current breaking reports of "FREE SEX" sponsored by the Obama Transition Team during the $150M inauguration "ball".
The outgoing President described a litany of Democratic Libido Transgressions that seemed to spark voters to "vote for the little pricks," as described by VP Dick Cheney, who rode "shotgun" during Bush's 8 year tenure in the White House.
Bush touched on tabloid tales concerning Bill Clinton, John Edwards, Jesse Jackson, Eliot Spitzer, Kwame Kilpatrick , Barney Frank and a host of others whose sexcapades were received without blinking by sex addicted constituents, in fact drawing them in even greater numbers to the polls.
"If we want to start taking control again in 2010, we have to start leading with our dicks, and not our hearts," Bush said passionately.
His advice to his sitting colleagues? "Just go out and F***somebody...and make sure it makes the 6 O'Clock news!"
Rush Limbaugh, though sympathetic, said it was already too late!
"The Democrats have been at this so long that their constituents are even beginning to like taking it up the A**! How else can you explain 40 years of corruption and failing infrastructure in our nation's inner cities?" F*** You, Very Much" has been the Dem's Creed for Decades!"
In an inner city Mayoral Memo, Obama has urged all reigning Mayors to start practicing "safe sex" when screwing constituents and trying to launder their proceeds, "don't put your money in the freezer, send it to Barney where it can't be traced, and you'll know it'll be SAFE kept under his TARP until you really need it!"
Dems are now calling their gratuitous untraced funding "OMarks" instead of EarMarks, in honor of the President Elect's most prominent feature.