Written by rfreed
Print this
Topics: bernard madoff

Friday, 16 January 2009

image for 'Madoff' Is Really Bernies 'Gangsta' Name
Bernie 'Made-off' Schlumphoffski As A Tormented Child

Bernard Madoff, the super-sleazy financial giant who made his money ruining peoples lives, is really named Charlie Schlumphoffski. Bernie Madoff, actually spelled 'Made-off,' is really his 'gangsta' moniker. It gave him more 'street cred' as he was coming up in the business world.

Schlumphoffski, tired of being picked on by Gentiles because of his name while he was growing up, adopted the name to give himself a new identity, an identity that eventually helped bring him to the top of the economic heap. Deciding he'd had enough, he schemed ways of revenge against those who'd belittled him. $50 billion and several Ponzi schemes later he'd lived up to his new name.

It appeared 'Made-off' had 'Paid-off' big time. And it didn't stop there. Whereas a criminal who had stolen $50 would spend at least a couple of days in jail, Madoff, who had stolen 50 billion and literally sodomized thousands of people financially, is allowed to be out on bail.

Bernie- you've got it Made in the Shade in Spades!.

Make rfreed's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 2 multiplied by 2?

7 15 10 4
51 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more