Placerville, California-Internationaly famous inspirational painter Thomas Kinkade said today that starting immediately, his new paintings will each feature a prominetly displayed UFO.
"I was abducted by aliens. I was told to paint these horribly kitschy paintings with radiating points of light. I did it for a long time.I hated it. Screw you, Mr. Spaceman! From now on I'm on a crusade to warn the world that alien beings are amongst us and pose an immediate threat to our planet."
In a lengthy interview with this reporter,Adam Click, Mr. Kinkade, sometimes babbling inchoherently, explained at great length and in some detail, how he was abducted by aliens in a humongous craft shaped like a Belgian Waffle while on a painting expedition in County Cork, Ireland.
Adam Click is a rabid writer who is desperately seeking attention. He resides in the small town of Cadbury on Chocolate. He has been a person since the day he was born....but just barely.