Written by Morse
Print this

Thursday, 8 January 2009

image for Blago's Next Salvo at DEMS: I May Remember Authenticating Barry's Birth Certificate,But Give Me a Minute, Will Ya?"
Blago Fires Back: DEMS Crap Their Pants and Surrender!

Chicago,Il./ Sun Times - Not since the days of George Patton racing to free US soldiers trapped in the Battle of the Bulge, have political historians seen such a fast moving offensive as that launched in recent days by Illinois' indicted Governor, Rod "The Impaler" Blagojevich.

First it was the leaked phone call from Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, telling Blago that none of the 2 black congressman, nor the black state senate majority leader would do for the US Senate appointment. But a couple of white people, he named were "acceptable."

That ranging shot from the bow of Blago stopped the Democratic leadership in their tracks...a warning that if they didn't back off the embattled Governor wold start firing for effect.

Reid and company immediately started backpedalling, Reid saying "Well, I might have reacted in haste toward Mr. Burris, as I hadn't even met him before, and he seems like a really, really, nice black man." Reid was referring to Roland Burris, a lobbyist, who had only made a $15k "down payment" on Obama's vacated Senate seat in the form of a campaign contribution to Blago.

Even Sen. Dianne Feinstein, D.CA, was coerced into coming on board the Burris/Blago Senate Train Express, after being warned by Mdm. speaker Pelosi
that Blago had even more damaging taped phone calls to make public than Nixon's Biographer...and none of it spoke well for the coming Obama Immaculate Inauguration!

Feinstein was the first DEM heavyweight to come out for seating Burris, at the same time she came on board for the Larry King appointment to the CIA, another concession to cement her hold on her political position in the Senate and the stranglehold on Congress by "The California Mafia" headed by Pelosi.

Rumors are starting to float around the Illinois state house that Blago could add to the Obama Birth Origin Saga, despite the fact that mystery seems to have been solved, thanks to a recent Spoof Investigative Series that explored the many myths and half truths surrounding his birth place, but remaining suspiciously silent on matters concerning his conception. Some say this could turn out to be another "unexplained stain" on Truth in Politics!

A librarian in the state's hall of records has said that another look at the wrinkled copy of Obama's birth certificate, all that exists to authenticate the President Elect's US birth status, appears to have been signed AND witnessed by Rod and Patty Blagojevich, 25 years after his alleged birth date!

Blago says "he thinks he remembers signing the document and applying the official state seal ," but added, "Ill have to check my records which will have to wait until these ridiculous charges against me are dropped!"

This further lends credence to the state motto that "YOU HAVE TO PAY TO PLAY", and that includes running for the office of President!

Las Vegas odds are now reflecting that not only will the Governor not be impeached, but that odds are 1-5 Blago will be given a seat on the World Bank in charge of handing out funds to 3rd world countries and bankrupt US Blue States, and that his wife will be named as head of the Government Accounting Office (GAO) in keeping with Obama's new theme to "stamp out waste."

Make Morse's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 1 plus 5?

8 6 15 14
49 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more