Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Topics: Breasts, Coffee

Friday, 9 January 2009

image for The Topless Coffee Shop
Bucky Barrymore giving topless waitress Vera Croxton, 61, two thumbs up (one for each breast)

VASSALBORO, Maine - In an effort to attract more customers, Rayburn Fiberfab, owner of The Fiberfab Seafood Grill & Coffee Shop has decided that his two waitresses will work topless.

Fiberfab said that the two waitresses, Vera Croxton and Maureen Keystone will wear skin-tight cut-off jean short shorts, white high-back Roman sandals, gold gypsy hoop earrings, and nothing else.

When a reporter for The Vassalboro Weekly Gazette, W.K. Alpenglow mentioned to Fiberfab that Vera and Maureen are both in their early 60's, Fiberfab replied, "so what?"

Alpenglow then responded by saying that he probably won't get too many male or female customers who want to be served their meal by two topless 60-year-old gals (bless their heart).

Fiberfab put down his bottle of Coors Light and said that Vera and Maureen are both very attractive-looking divorcees and that each is constantly getting hit on by men between the ages of 29 and 79.

He then added that he has personally gone out with each woman and that Vera actually has two of the prettiest breasts that he has seen in probably 18 or 20 years.

He then stated that a lot of the townsmen think that this year's Divine Dutchess of The Daffodil Festival, Millicent Santarelli, 28, has beautiful-looking breasts.

But in his opinion, Milly's nubile tits, as amazingly gorgeous as they are, cannot hold a candle to Vera's 36-D 'twin girls.'

Fiberfab then said about Maureen that at 63, she does not have any cellulite on her thighs at all. He added that there are no varicose veins on her legs, no stretch marks on her stomach, and no unsightly blemishes on her ass.

Maureen overheard Fiberfab make those remarks and she walked over to him and gave him a big hug. She then winked at him and she reached down and grabbed his crotch a little bit. Fiberfab smiled a smile as big as Dallas and Fort Worth put together.

And as Maureen gracefully walked away Fiberfab shook his head and said that if he was not already married that he would ask her to marry him in a New York minute.

In a related story. Pamela Anderson told Oprah Winfrey that she put her childhood training bra on eBay and ended up selling it to Fredericks of Hollywood for $19,391.72.

Make Abel Rodriguez's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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