Written by Bureau
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Topics: Old People, Birds

Sunday, 4 January 2009

image for Hummingbird Back At Granny Lungsfords
Prez Throwing Out First Ball For Last Year's The Dumbass Dickweed's First Game

Morgan Ridge resident Grandma Joleen "Jolly" Lungsford, 81, announced Tuesday that a hummingbird, which she has reported seeing on multiple occasions in the past several weeks, was back at the birdfeeder outside her kitchen window.

"My little friend was back today," said Lungsford, who has spent the past four afternoons periodically looking out the window to check if the hummingbird had returned. "We had a very nice time together. I drunk tea and watched him drink sugar-water."

In a series of telephone calls, voicemail messages and notes to her children, grandchildren and the Dumbassville Daily Banner, Lungsford informed everyone that the hummingbird stopped by her home at approximately 12:05 p.m.CDT.

"I was waiting around all morning, and then suddenly there he was," Lungsford said. "I thought the little fellow would fly off right away, but no, he decided to stay for a meal."

Lungsford also ate a chicken salad sandwich wrapped in a napkin while watching the bird.

In other news, a raging house fire on Helm Street took the lives of nine members of the Dayton Keats family, damaged fifteen other houses on three blocks, caused Heddie Henderson to die of a sudden heart attack, her husband of 45 years, Herman, to go hang himself, injured seven firefighters who came from three counties and caused the evacuation of nearly five hundred people.

(The Dumbass Daily Banner)

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