Written by Lang Syne

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Topics: New York, Driving

Wednesday, 17 December 2008

Mayor Bloomberg of New York City has come up with what he considers to be a brilliant plan to save the city from financial disaster and curb the massive daily flow of traffic through Manhattan.

In addition to the tolls he plans to exact from the citizenry who use the 59th Street, Williamsburg and Manhattan bridges, High Occupancy Vehicle lanes (HOV), minimum five passengers, are to be introduced along 5th, 6th and 7th Avenues with EZ Pass electronic toll collection devices placed every two blocks.

Drivers who do not have the EZ Pass transponders and who use these Avenues, will be fined $100 each time they pass an EZ Pass collection point. Drivers who do not have the required minimum of five passengers will also be fined. Thus, if a violator travels from 42nd Street to 56th street, the fine could be as high as $700.

Cameras will be placed the length of each Avenue to capture violators on film.

In another move to shore up City finances, an anonymous source states that he is looking to sell Staten Island to either the State of New Jersey or the Waste Management Corporation.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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