Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Thursday, 27 November 2008

image for Russell Brand To Star In His Own U.S. Reality Show
Fox Network Studio FNS-106-K, where Russell Brand will telecast his new show

NEW YORK CITY, New York - British celebrity Russell Brand has just been signed to star in his own reality television series on the Fox Network.

Kendell Ketchum, spokesman for Fox said, 'The name of the show is 'Russell Brand: Okay, Let Me See Who The Hell I Can Offend Today.'"

Ketchum added, "Mr. Brand is easily one of today's most recognizable celebrities. He has a distinct personality, an embracing attitude, and a devil-may-care hairdo.

Brand will literally be given free reign to do pretty much whatever he wants to do. The only thing we ask is that he not hurt anyone physically, that he refraim from neutering any animals in the studio, and that he not mention his girlfriend's explicit private body parts on the air.

However, we do have one of the nation's top law firms at our disposal. In 20 years, the Philadelphia law firm of Pennypacker, Brinkerhoff, Yucatan, Jewelowitz, and Changlow has never lost a case."

When contacted at his London estate, 'Blimey Acres,' Russell said, "I am thrilled to be able to once again cross the pond and go over to America and show the American people my unique brand of humor, no pun intended.

The show will be a fantastic venue for me to showcase my amazing talent. Everyone from California to New York will be able to witness first-hand my unbounded creativity, my hilarious hilarity, and my devil-may-care hairdo."

Brand then added, "So this new reality show in America will give me a chance to put the Andrew Sach's granddaughter incident behind me. And I plan on never mentioning the name Georgina Baillie again. Georgina Baillie...gosh I will really have to work on that won't I? Cheerio mates."

In a related story, GOP mouthpiece and the free-world's biggest anti-Democrat, Ann Coulter, a regular guest on the Fox Network show Hannity and Colmes has been kidnapped.

A group calling itself, 'The Acme Ransom Alliance #7' said that Miss Coulter is fine. She is in good spirits and she is being fed mac and cheese, peanut butter celery sticks, and tap water.

The kidnappers are demanding that Fox pay a ransom of $2 million. Fox has reportedly said that they'll only pay $900...take it or leave it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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