Written by Paul Edwards
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Topics: Space, Astronaut

Wednesday, 19 November 2008

image for Astronaut Loses Damn Hand Bag in Space
"Proposed Emergency Tampon Replacement"

NASA - An Astronaut lost her bag during a space walk today as she attempted to effect repairs to a joint on the international space station. Astronaut Heidemarie Stefanyshyn-Piper was attempting to loosen a stiff joint when a grease gun exploded causing her to drop the bag.

Engineers believed she may have applied to much grip on the grease gun causing it to heat up and expel its' contents before it was ready. "It has never happened before, honest" the lead engineer was heard to say. She dropped the bag when she attempted to wipe the grease off of her new outfit.

"Ewwwww" was all she said at first, then "My damn car keys were in that bag as well as all my credit cards". Later she was heard to remark that she no longer had her lipstick or mascara or her emergency stash of tampons. "I hope I get back to earth before the painters are in" she moaned.

Scientists at NASA were working on an emergency replacement for the astronauts' tampons if the need arose.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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