Langley, Va - (AssoCIAted Mess): The President George Herbert Bush Center for Intelligence (sic) CIA sources say that the Somali highjackers of the Sirius Star Saudi oil tanker may have accessed the vessel from a Russian Oscar-II nuclear cruise missile submarine seen earlier off the coast of Mad-A-Gas-Car.
Aerial reconnaissance photos released today show a shadowy replica of the ill-fated K-141 Kursk lurking in the Indian Ocean.
The Kursk sank in a sea tragedy in August 2000 after a mystery internal explosion wrecked her hull.
The Sirius Star is carrying over 2,000,000 barrels of Sordid Arabian crude and was borded by pirates on Sunday.
"We too don't believe a bunch of halfwitted Somali renegades could have pulled off this one," a Royal navy source commented.
Captain Marko Ramius was the last known commander of the ill-fated Kursk.