Written by Bureau
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Topics: Indiana Jones

Monday, 17 November 2008

Determined to make his son's birthday dreams come true despite deep financial woes, Gary Lonas Wilson of Nashville, Tennessee spent late Saturday night practicing and four hours in his backyard Sunday acting out the latest Indiana Jones movie.

"I wrote down everything my neighbor down the street told me was in the movie and I just switched hats 127 times or turned some backwards and acted out the whole silly movie, saving $60.00 counting popcorn and $5.00 cokes.

"My son, Reboram Lonas, looked pretty disgusted for awhile but pretty soon he started to smile and then to giggle and then laugh out loud and finally he was rolling on the ground after I had dogshit on my elbow which he also found funny. Then he laughed so hard he got the hiccups.

"That was when I accidentily bull-whipped my neighbor mowing his yard who proceded to run over their poodle dog, Alfred Jay, who had left his present in my backyard.

"Meanwhile, I had completely forgotten the ending but by that time, there were neighborhood kids running around here everywhere and I had two black eyes, a bullwhip that looks like it needs some Viagra, two lawsuits and the PETA people picketing the house and jeering me as I was trying to bag up pieces of Alfred Jay.

"Probably shoulda just took him to that movie."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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