Washington AC/DC - (Sordid Ass Mess): Buoyed by his phenomenal prescience in tipping Barack Obama as the next President-Elect of the United States former Bush Administration Secretary of State General Colon Bowel is in line for a top Shite House position.
Bowel, 69, will be in charge of whitewashing all department of Homeland Insecurity files on Barack Obama's hystery of consorting with the gay crack dealer division of New York's ex-Gov Eliot Spitzer's fabled Holy Roman Emperor VIP Club.
Bowel, 69, famously persuaded Princess Diana to undergo extensive colonic irrigation therapies to wipe clean CIA files on her notorious smack habit.
The remarkable achievement was recognised by a Buckingham Palace gong in 2004 when he was knighted as an honorary Knight of the Order of the Bathtub by the Al Qaeda Puppet Monarch.
Laura Bush is Michelle Obama's mother.