WASHINGTON, D.C. - President-elect Barack Obama was asked by ABC's Charlie Gibson what immediate changes he plans on making to his new future home, The White House.
Obama smiled and said "Well first of all, I will be having the presidential bowling alley taken out and I will be replacing it with a basketball court.
I am still working out the details but I am planning on having a benefit basketball game on Valentine's Day 2009. And all of the proceeds that are collected from that game will be used to feed a child in Kenya for 34 years."
Obama remarked, "I have already contacted four of the best baskeball players in the NBA and all have agreed to participate in a 3-on-3 basketball game. My team The Obama Kings will be made up of myself, Tony Parker, and LeBron James. The other team The Biden Bees will be made up of Joe Biden, Kobe Bryant, and Mike Bibby."
Obama added that Heidi Klum will lead the Obama Kings cheerleaders and that the Joe Biden cheerleaders will be led by Nancy Pelosi. Both cheerleading squads will be using cheerleader outfits which will be graciously loaned to them by the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders, or as they are known south of the border, "Las Mamacitas de los Vaqueros."
Charlie Gibson asked President-elect Obama, "Ah Mr. President-elect sir, don't you think that installing the basketball court is going to be quite an expensive little frivolous endeavor especially given the sad state of the nation's economy?"
And Obama replied, "Charlie, let me first say that you will not be disrespecting me like you did Sarah Palin...so dude, let's get that straight right from the get-go.
Secondly, Charlie, if there is one thing that this young Kenyan-Kansan young man has learned it's to CYA. So having said that, let me add that you are exactly correct in saying that the new basketball court is going to be expensive.
In fact, the total cost will be way up there in the tens of millions of dollars. But here is the important thing...and Charlie pay real close attention. The new White House basketball arena, which by the way I am naming 'The Michelle Obama - First Mama White House Arena.' will be built without one single dime of taxpayer's money."
Charlie quickly asked, "How???" And Obama answered, "Charlie this beautiful state-of-the-art basketball facility is being built with money donated expressly to 'The Michelle Obama - First Mama White House Arena' fund.
And all of it came directly from three of my best friends; Oprah Winfrey, who will be my new Secretary of the Treasury, Bill Cosby, who will be my new Secretary of Education, and Sean Combs who will be my new Secretary of Defense."
Gibson smiled and said, "Astounding...simply astounding." And he then added, "Mr. Obama, sir, you are a true American. And I say this with the utmost respect, you are a classic example of a first class "Wheeler-Dealer," in the truest sense of the word."
Obama grinned, shook Gibson's hand and said, "Charlie my man, you are so fundamentally correct. Oh and by the way I am still looking for a Press Secretary...so keep your cell phone handy you hear?"