In a bizarre and shocking twist to the US presidential election, Ralph Nader has won. He gained 280 electoral college votes, more than the 270 required.
Although Nader trailed in the polls by a large margin behind the two favorites Barack Obama and John McCain, it has been revealed that Nader's supporters were giving false results to the pollsters. In fact, Nader has been steadily increasing his share of the vote for the last few years, mostly by cloning himself and alleged electoral fraud.
A Nader presidency will introduce some controversial policies - cars will be replaced by moving walkways, gun owners will be castrated, beef will be rationed, abortion will be compulsory, and atheism will be the national religion - however these policies are apparently now supported by a majority of the population so are likely to become law in the next few months.