Written by Bureau
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Topics: Insects, Hearing, sound

Thursday, 30 October 2008

In an almost supernatural display of extraordinary patience, auditory precision, and hypnotic concentration, 59-year-old Walter Barnes Burden of Beaver, West Virginia interrupted his favorite radio program, "The Prairie Home Companion" in order to track down and isolate a cricket in the closet of his Helm Street home Saturday evening.

"At first it sounded like it was coming from all over the place, until I realized it was near the coat closet," Burden told the Beaver Banner.

He explained he was able to overcome the cricket's tactic of not chirping when someone gets close to it by pretending to be the statue on the courthouse lawn, listening "really hard," and waiting for the sound to start again.

"It took two hours and a half of dedicated searching, but it was all worthwhile when I realized it was just one of the voices in my head up to his old tricks. I call him, 'Wormy'. Listen! LISTEN!! Now he's going like a bullfrog! Hee hee hee!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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