After twenty-one months of the most grueling political marathon in Presidential campaign history, pollsters report that there are still a significant number of potential voters who identify as undecided. Neither party can believe that after millions of dollars of ads, debates, rallies and downright bribery, some folks still cannot make up their minds.
Political psychologist, Hilo Down-Enout reminded observers that this phenomenon is part of every day life: "Haven't you been behind an undecider at the deli counter? You are most likely in a hurry 'cause the dogs and kids are locked in a car which is about to reach 150 degrees and you know exactly the three cold cuts you want a quarter of a pound of.
"But an undecider snatched the little paper number right before you and they are now ion their fifth tasting of the three havartis the deli has to offer.
"You want to scream and trap the indecisive one in an hammerlock but civilization dictates that you must wait politely while your children and pets bake like the rotisserie chicken you are staring at so you don't ring the neck of the havarti taster."
Dr Down-Enout used this vivid example to explain why both parties have agreed to load the undecided on buses and drive them off cliffs. Observers believe it may be the first bi-partisan agreement ever during a Presidential campaign.
When asked who will be driving the buses, the good doctor explained: "Why, Deciders, of course..."