Written by Sean Fenley
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Thursday, 2 October 2008

Leaders on Capitol Hill today were selling out the American people. They were offering a cool $700 billion dollars, to their contributors and cronies from New York's financial center.

Nancy Pelosi, at a press conference of House and Senate leaders, said, "We're not talking about a bailout we're talking about a bail-in er buy in that is. A buy in to some really toxic debts so that the taxpayers can get all or most of their money back. We think this is a great investment, because when we normally fritter away the taxpayers dime, we don't expect to see any kind of return on the money."

Harry Reid commented, "Yes we've got to get the taxpayers to buy into our Ponzi scheme er investment in the future of the country."

Pelosi added, "We want to take the money from Main Street and put it into Wall Street."

Rahm Emmanuel was also at the press conference and he stated, "To get the economy running again, we need an infusion of our grandkids' indebted money to make the credit flow again."

Majority leader Steny Hoyer said, "As long as we've got the credit card out, hey folks, drinks are on us."

This was not the first time on Capitol Hill that politicians had used a national crisis to spend the taxpayers money with an unhealthy and even reckless disregard for the public trust.

Pelosi concluded her remarks by indicating that today's efforts in congress could, with near certainty, be counted on to happen again someday quite soon, "This won't be the last time we take money from hard working Americans who make a living by the sweat of their brow, and turn it over to some of the most avaricious, parisitic, and ethically challenged people in the country. We're just doing our level best, to represent the people and interests that sent us to Washington to pursue their plutocratic agenda."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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