Written by Monkey Woods
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Sunday, 28 September 2008

image for Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders To Perform Behind-Closed-Doors Show For Henry Kissinger

The Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders, made famous by the many stories written about them by this author, are to perform a one-off behind-closed-doors 'show' for one of their all-time biggest fans, the former US Secretary of State, Dr Henry Kissinger.

Dr Kissinger, who was in the news recently when he bid for the Sarah Palin nude photos, has long been a fan of the Cowboys girls, and has had 'fictitious romances' with several of them in his bathroom.

When Terrie Tonkem, the Cowgirls choreographer heard of his legendary fandom, she thought it would be a cool publicity opportunity to have the Doctor come down to see his 'girls' and to make a video with them. Kissinger was described as "pleased" to take part.

The girls, who recently 'went naked', met Kissinger for a get-to-know-you session last week, and are set to perform for him before the Cincinnati game next week.

Kissinger told Sarah Maitlis of the BBC:

"My palms are schweating! Zey are so byootiffull! I vont to touch zer boobies!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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