Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Tuesday, 16 September 2008

image for Tina Fey (aka Sarah Palin)
The Alaskan Queen's High Heels

NEW YORK CITY - An assistant to Governor Sarah Palin has stated that 'Salmon Sarah' really liked (and approved) of comedian Tina Fey's impersonation of her on NBC's Saturday Night Live.

Amy Poehler mimicked Hillary Clinton, but it was Tina's on-the-money impersonation of 'The Alaskan Queen' that stole the show. In fact, Palin made this remark to an aide, "My goodness and my gosh, for a few moments there I really thought that it was really me, but then when I saw Hillary standing next to me I realized that it wasn't me because I noticed that Hillary doesn't look anything at all like 'Big Mac' (McCain).

Courtney Zerkowski, 38, a bureau chief for CNN has stated that one of 'Dog Sled' Sarah's secondary spokespersons has told a reporter for The Juneau Morning-Dispatcher-Times-Post-Haste Chronicle that they are actually in negotiations with representatives of Tina Fey in hopes of hiring her to travel all around the country (as Sarah's stand-in) so that she can answer questions on foreign affairs. They genuinely hope to do this so that Sarah can actually be at two places at the same time.

Meanwhile, Decollete Dejavu, 47, a senior writer for the Paris-based publication Ohh La La Qui Qui Magazine asked 'Lipstick' Palin what she thought about foreign affairs. Sarah smiled, giggled for three seconds, put her right index finger in the middle of her chin and replied, "Well to be perfectly truthful and somewhat honest, I feel that what an adult male and an adult female do, in say, France, Norway, or even Rio de Janeiro is strictly, totally, basically, and completely the personal business of the adult guy and adult gal who are involved in this foreign affair."

Palin went on to say, "And let me make this abundantly clear as well as clearly abundant that I do not feel that we as Americans, and by that I mean all Americans, whether we live in my beautiful Alaska, Hawaii, or any of the Lower 48 states, should have the right or for that matter the left to interfere in the extra-marital affairs of any male and female adults whether those two individuals are married, single, divorced, seperated, married, or divorced. And please forgive me if I repeat myself from time to time, it's just that I haven't had a Caribou Cheeseburger in days and I am craving one so damn bad."

Sarah continued by saying, "But anyway thank you all so much and let me just say that my running mate John McCain, who is 72-years-old, was a POW for five and a half years. Now in closing, and to answer about 7,000 or so questions on this matter, let me say to you that I will eventually promise to start talking about some of the important issues in this campaign such as health care, the economy, job losses, and the middle class. And I do give you my solemn word as a proud 'Alaskan Queen' on that."

In related news. The University of Mount Rushmore will be offering a new course starting next month entitled, "The Quintessential Art of Political Lying 101."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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