Written by Francine Fishpaw

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Thursday, 28 August 2008

During the Democratic Convention cable news correspondent and Hard Ball host, Chris Matthews asked for Barack Obama's hand in marriage live on TV after he gave his speech.

Matthews had previously stated that when Barack Obama spoke he felt a tingling sensation go up and down his leg.

In front of a shocked nation, Matthews tearfully, in a rambling speech finally lost it and offered his undying love for the Democratic nominee for president, Barack Obama, and asked for his hand in marriage.

The shows camera man told Matthews that Barack Obama was already married to Michelle Obama, and he wasn't going to leave her for him. Matthews angrily pounded the desk and replied "I don't care! The man makes my whole body quiver and my legs are still tingling. I want him to ravage me". Then suddenly the screen went black and in a matter of minutes MSNBC resumed but without Chris Matthews. There were unconfirmed reports from insiders that Matthews had been dragged off the stage kicking, screaming and crying incessantly. Insiders said that he was whimpering and sobbing repeatedly "Barack Obama, why won't you have me"?

Luckily for Chris Matthews his meltdown went widely unreported until late in the evening because very few people watch MSNBC.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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