Written by Unconfirmed Source
Print this
Topics: Report, Action

Sunday, 23 May 2004

image for GOP to Alter State Boundaries
The shape of things to come!

Unconfirmed Sources report new plans are in the works for nationwide redistricting. Troubled by stubbornly Democratic states, one Republican congressional leader stated "Direct action is required to insure GOP hegemony." On the heels of the stunning Republican success in Texas the GOP plans to continue its illegal redistricting campaigns on the "largest scale possible."

"The 2000 election proved that the current districting is dangerously balanced." Complained Karl Rove. Concerned that future elections may not have the same result as 2000 campaign, the GOP strategy is to break up Democratic strongholds like California.

Governor Schwartznager and Tom Delay have been working on the plan for several months. "Why would the governor preside over the destruction on his own state?" The word on the street is that he might become a regional governor with control over three or four of the new states.

The plans for California involve annexing most of its territory to neighboring states with mostly Republican populations.

The first step is to carve off Southern California to dilute the very democratic LA area and create new republican strong points New-Arizona, with 30 electoral votes and New-vada, with 27.

The second phase would require Northern California to be combined with a new Super Idaho, with 21 votes. The Central coast from Santa Cruz north to the Bay Area would be the new democratically controlled State of California with 10 electoral votes, instead of the current 54.

Washington watchers are amazed by the brilliance of the plan. "Delay has really out done himself this time."

The Democrats are taking a wait and see approach on the whole matter.

Make Unconfirmed Source's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 1 multiplied by 2?

4 7 2 22
43 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more