Written by queen mudder
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Wednesday, 16 July 2008

image for Birkhead UFO-proofs Dannielynn nursery after ominous Elaine T Marshall-shaped craft fly-past
Dannielynn's Pa is taking no chances

Burbank, Ca - (Alien Mess): Larry Birkhead has installed a titanium bubble over Dannielynn's nursery after an ominous Elaine T Marshall-shaped UFO was seen hovering menacingly above his Burbank home.

The venomous-looking craft had been reported previously late last year near Anna Nicole Smith's grave at the Nassau Lakeview Memorial Gardens and Mausoleum.

It sparked manic fears that alien graverobbers were about to suck up the ex-Playboy centerfold's corpse into the stratosphere in a traditional extraterrestrial homing ceremony linked to the equinox.

Since that appearance it has been spotted several times over Burbank, whirling excitedly outside Dannielynn's nursery window late at night.

Birkhead's new security measures were taken just weeks ahead of the 9th Circuit Court adjudication that is widely expected to rule that Anna Nicole Smith's daughter will scoop $500 million of J Howard Marshall's estate.

Elaine T Marshall is the late billionaire's daughter-in-law and stands to inherit less than $5 million from her husband's legacy after consecutive lawsuits found in Anna Nicole's favor.

"After legal fees, probate expenses, death taxes and some horrendous losses on US property market investments Marshall will be lucky to get ten grand from her old man," an inheritance legal expert told LA FagHagSlagMag this week.

Little Dannielynn is nearly two years old.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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