Written by Jeff Tamarkin
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Topics: Divorce, Laura Bush

Thursday, 20 May 2004

image for Laura Bush Seeks Divorce
"Yes, more than my mind is small."

Citing "irreconcilable indifferences, his thing is way too small and other problems," Laura Bush has filed for divorce against King George the Dunce.

"I can't even find his you-know-what, his hands and fingers are stumpy and useless, and his tongue can't speak Spanish, let alone English or finding my magic button."

Mrs. Bush is asking for 5 billion dollars, 3/4 of the White House, and a court order against her twin daughters coming within a mile of her: "Let's face it. Jenna and Barbara are drunken drugged out whores, I deserve a large chunk of the Whitey House, and Dumya has enough stock and land and cash to feed a dozen Chinese armies."

Mrs. Bush has plans to open a driving school, "have an orgasm without a vibrator for the first time in ten years," and/or become a Democrat and work for John Kerry.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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