Written by Ed E. Druckman
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Friday, 11 July 2008

image for John McCain's iPhone 3G Blog
LOL. I crack myself up.

(Washingtion, D.C.) It was a blog entry on JohnMcCain.com that could have been easily overlooked in the wake of the comments made earlier this week in "The Washington Post" by top adviser to McCain, Phil Gramm, no relation to the concert promoter, that America has become "a nation of whiners."

But it wasn't by Amoelogger, a poster on the web site Digg.com. And because of that, the McCain blog about waiting on line at New York City's Apple store to get the new iPhone 3G now has a record 1X1026th (Yes, for the first time scientific notation had to be used for a Digg rating.) Diggs.

Many of the entries, written in chronological order, show a surprising side to McCain. As in this entry from 5:20AM, showing doubt,"I never thought I'd be standing in line with all of these hippies. That reminds me, I better get a hair cut. I wonder if it makes me a communist? I'm standing on line like they do. But I guess it's okay, because they would usually wait on line for things like toilet paper, and this is an iPhone. I can't wait to get that. It's time for a little straight talk and some cool apps. too. Besides, the view isn't bad. I'm right behind this blond who could be Joey Heathertone's sister. Mental Note: Tell Cindy to wear more jumpsuits."

However, an entry of 6:45AM shows a McCain back to his pugnacious self, "These (expletive deleted) [Editor's note: McCain wrote (expletive deleted).] hippies are starting to get to me. With my military training, I could smash through them like Chuck Heston in "Planet of the Apes". But I can't. Obama would have a field day with that. Hum, I bet he doesn't have an iPhone 3G. Maybe I could use that against him?"

Then there is the entry of 7:30AM, now the most commented on Digg, "I can't believe that I have to sign a two-year contract with AT&T to get this phone! What kind of commie crap is this? I'm definitely going to have talk with Comrade Jobs about this. Let's see him walk on the next options backdating case. Oops, better delete this entry."

During his five-hour wait, McCain also showed that he saw it as proof of his stamina to be President. An entry from 8:00AM, "Been up for three hours. Still no signs of fatigue. Might even skip my afternoon nap. Care to play some one on one half court hoops, Senator Obama?"

McCain did finally get his new iPhone 3G at exactly 10:01AM. "I got it, and she's a beut! Now, it's time for a little straight talk. I'm going call that Phil Gramm…every name in the book. LOL. I crack myself up."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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