Adolescent writers, who only write about sex and, well, sex, because they never have any, are to be banned, and in fact are to be shot.
Speaking from Darkest Peru, one kid said: 'My name is Paddington, what is satire? What is irony? Why is America such a joke?' And another juvenile, President George Wishiwasanadult Bloob added: 'The war on satire continues, as long as we can attack our own skyscrapers. Vote Cretin!'
For 232 years, Europeans have held the USA in contempt as being a dumping ground for unwanted idiots, with no brains, but now they're going to be shot. When hearing this, many American burst into tears and avoided the draft, one which the British invented, to use Americans as cannon fodder in 2 World Wars. Luckily Americans have easy access to weapons, though, in case they fall out with their mother-in-laws.
Che Guevara is 44