Written by 3.14159
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Topics: School, Eating

Thursday, 20 May 2004

This afternoon, while The Shell Answer-Man was giving a speech titled "The Importance of Eating Your Vegetables" at The Joe Schmuckatelli Middle School in Baker, North Dakota, Billy Farnsworth blurted out "What's eight times seven?"

Ray Zhor, who goes by the moniker "The Shell Answer-Man" stumbled a bit, as he tried to blow-off the question.

"Can't you see that I'm in the middle of a speech?" Zhor replied to Billy.

Billy came right-back with "I don't care.", and he asked the question again.

Zhor, who has always had problems with this particular multiplication fact tried to answer the question. He reportedly said "Fifty-eight... no, sixty-three... no, seventy-two..., no...", at which time he broke-down and started sobbing uncontrollably on the stage.

Paramedics were called, but they had to defer to aids from Nutz to You, the local sanitarium.

Executives from Shell Oil did not return our phone calls.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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