Written by disciple
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Saturday, 5 July 2008

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This is one of the un-benefits of Red wine

A new study was released this week; giving more evidence as to the benefits of moderate Wine drinking. The Institute of North American Winos, headquarter in Harlem New York, published its results online.

The study director, Woodrow the wino, outlined several of its studies findings:

Red wine has shown calming effects on individuals coming down from a Crack High. Apparently components in Red Wine have s stabilizing effect, allowing individuals to engage in more petty crime or prostitution in order to get another hit.

Drinking Red wine is also a very good time consuming activity, for the chronically unemployable. Woodrow, advises more unemployed people to drink wine preferably during day light hours, on street corners or in parks. Woodrow remakes with the growing economy crisis and the increasing unemployment rate, Red wine will be more necessary.

Red wine is also a good pain reliever for gun and stab wounds. Woodrow advises, after being shot or stab drinking Red wine instead of going to the hospital is a growing option for those without insurance.

Red Wine has also demonstrated a benefit to individuals moving into Narcotic Drug addictions like Crack and heroin, apparently; it acts as a buffer and allows for a smoother transition.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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